the Daughter of the Devil
Pilot: How you doin’ folks? This is your captain speaking. Just wanted to let you know as soon as we get done here. We are going to begin the movie on this flight which is Legally Blonde 2. You can uh find the audio on channel 11 and if you get a chance also take a look out your window because pretty soon I’m going to fly this plane straight down and drive as deep down into the ocean as I can. Your mother sucks (beep)s in hell, praise Satan.
Co Pilot: Hey folks this is the co pilot speakin’. Umm if there’s an exorcist or a priest on board could you uhh identify yourself to a member of the flight crew. Uhh sure would appreciate it. Kinda need you to do that right away if you could. Once again you can find the audio for Legally Blonde 2 on channel 11.
DJ Jess: I want to push DJing. I want it to be more than DJing, and also less than DJing. That’s why I started incorporating nearicles into my set. Nearicles are like almost miracles. You get close, but it’s not quite there. It’s, it’s a nearicle.
DJ Jess: Now I don’t know you do I? We’ve never met before?
DJ Jess: Is your name Delilah?
DJ Jess: Oh. Seriously? I’m usually good at this. Is t tommy hilfiger uk his your phone number? (Doves crap out number on pavement)
Woman: Oh my God, how’d you do that?
DJ Jess: I’ll call you and tell you later. When we are fucking.
Woman: You’re not gonna fuck me.
DJ Jess: Hello? Open your eyes. It’s me on top of you, fucking you.
Special Father 1: At the time, we were also blind to the most horrible secret of all: the Devil’s unholy move into the casual after work style bar and grill business.
Devil: Oh, I’m ordering your Tequila Sally’s uniform. So what are you, a ten?
Devil: Mmm tommy hilfiger uk m, I don’t think so. I mean really? Ah, maybe I don’t know women’s clothing.
Lucy: I think maybe you don’t. Or women’s body types, because there’s no universe in which I am a twelve.
Devil: Okay tommy hilfiger uk , Lucy. I don’t want to order you a six and then you’re gonna tell me, a week after I get it for you, I need a ten. Or I need a twelve.
Lucy: That’s not gonna happen.
Devil: Alright, so between now and the time the six comes in, you should lose twenty pounds.
Opening song: I don’t want to go to sleep. Lucy won’t you come with me. Let’s go paint the town red, Let’s go paint the town red. All these people bother me, let’s go on a killing spree. Let’s go paint the town red.
Lucy: Hey, you know what would be horribly bad and tacky?
DJ Jess: A restaurant chain? That’s the belly of the beast man. That’s awesome. We’ll shoot it for the DVD, and we won’t just do karaoke, we’ll do Escape Ee Oke.
DJ Jess: Hey you smell something? Yeah you smell it, right Judas? Yeah, it smells like fish. Yeah, like right behind (reach tommy hilfiger uk es to side of Lucy’s head and pulls back arm with a platter of fish in his hand) your ear. Stay for dinner?